It's hard to believe that it has been almost 2 years now that I have been struggling with anxiety. I've come a long way since then, but I still have a long way to go. I recently had received the Midwest Center's program for overcoming anxiety from my boyfriend's mother (how sweet of her :) ). I've been using the program, but am just in the early stages of it. It keeps me super busy though because it has reading material, homework assignments, audio lessons, and a DVD with sessions I have to watch. I'm not complaining though, anything that will help me through this is A-Okay with me! I just wanted to apologize for not updating this blog as much as I'd like to.
When I had my first panic attack almost 2 years ago, everything changed. I had this really intense fear of leaving the apartment. I didn't even want to go downstairs to check the mail. The thought of leaving the apartment would put me in such a panicked state; so I didn't. I guess I felt that if I stayed at home, there would be less of a chance that I had another panic attack. The apartment was my "safe" place.
Anxiety disorders are a terrible thing to experience at any age, but being a young female fresh out of college, it devastated me. My social life died completely. The career I thought I would pursue had to be put on hold. Even the simplest things like going to the bank to pay bills was out of the question at that time.
Luckily, I'm doing better, and I am getting better everyday. Like I said, I'm not "there" yet, but when I look back at how bad it was, I realize that I've come a long way. I try and go out regularly, though some days it is A LOT harder than others.
Anyways, I thought I'd share that little bit of information about myself. I hope it explains my absence on this blog. I will be posting regularly from here on out at My Complex, Simple Life. How liberating it feels to be able to express my feelings without shame. For so long I had felt inadequate/flawed....
Oh one last thing, with the program, I had to cut caffeine from my diet. Going from almost 2 pots of coffee every day to nothing was a scary process! But now I am all about the tea, and I feel less anxious overall. If you suffer from anxiety, I suggest you try this!